One of the best things about being a writer is that theoretically I can work from wherever, so when Rupak is filming someplace exotic I can go with him for the entire shoot. In reality, however, it doesn’t quite work out like that, and his two months of shooting Cheetah Girls III in Udaipur, India unfortunately happened at the same time as the book launch for Body Drama. I did, however, get to sneak away to India for two amazing weeks, and I did a bit of Body Drama promotion, too! Here are a few highlights:

This adorable elephant was actually featured in the movie, so when Rupak saw him in the street, he asked the owner for a quick ride! He was so sweet and hairy! I wanted to nom nom nom him forever but we had to get back to set for the final shots.

On set, Rupak introduced me to the cast and crew, who were all gorgeous and delightful (more on them later) and I was especially excited to meet Roshan Seth, not just because of his amazing acting work but because he was really interested in Body Drama. As soon as I met him he was all, “vaginas” this and “vaginas” that and I just wanted to give him a hug and hang out with him forever. Apparently, one of the women who works for him is constantly suffering from painful UTIs and he felt that the info offered in the “Down There” chapter would help her (particularially the info on proper wiping technique). After shooting ended and everyone went their separate ways, I decided that he needed to have his very own autographed copy of Body Drama, so when we got to New Delhi (his hometown) we decided to take a trip to the post office to send him one.

We rolled up in the place, looking for shipping materials and tape, only to find out that there are no regulated postal materials and that we would have to go to a “packingwalla” to get the book boxed up. Imagine our surprise when the packingwalla was just a guy sitting underneath a tree outside of the post office!

In India, cloth is favored over paper for packaging, so after asking a few questions about how the package was to be sent (overnight delivery, at the grand cost of 75 cents), he charged us 40 cents (fifteen rupees) to sew the package up.

I mean he actually SEWED the package up! With string! If we had wanted it, packagewalla would have melted red wax on the corners to secure the thread but we were afraid it would get on the book.

Then, packagewalla wrote the address on the cloth and voila! The package was ready to be sent, and the next day, Roshan had his book. He said the woman squealed with delight when she saw the pages of vaginas and took the book from him immediately, asking him to translate information into Hindi, which is awesome!

Anyway, after that, Rupak surprised me with some of the stuff he’d gotten for me while I wasn’t there. Some guys give girls flowers, other guys give candy or jewelry…my guy gives me a bedspread covered in (accidental) vaginas. He said he saw it and thought of me. Oh, how he knows me so well!

Y’all…there are just so many posts I have to share with you, from the handmade (accidental) vulva-patterned bedspread that Rupak surprised me with in India to the (accidentally) vulva-shaped chocolate that awaited me in my Bombay hotel to my crazy experience sending a copy of Body Drama through the India Postal Service in New Delhi (where overnight service only costs 30 cents)…but since I’ve gotten back everything has just been a whirlwind! I’m off to be a part of Eve Ensler’s amazing SUPERLOVE event in the New Orleans Superdome this weekend, and I’ll have plenty, plenty, plenty to post about then, too, so stay tuned. I am so thrilled and honored to be a part, and you can read more about my event on Saturday and the other events here on Eve’s site.

Until my next post (which I promise will be Monday), here’s a clip of me from this week’s appearance on Better.tv to promote Body Drama!

“I was never allowed this stuff growing up, and, there’s a reason,” said Ms. Redd, who wrote “Body Drama.” “Pregnant women can’t get highlights, what makes it safe for little girls? These girls are going from baby to mini-adult. They feel naked without their highlights. I think we need a giant dose of realism here.”

Read the full article, “A Girl’s Life, With Highlights,” written by Camille Sweeney, right here (I’m on page 2).

UPDATE: Ooh!  I’m on Jezebel!

This is so sad, y’all! I just got back from two weeks in India and I had all sorts of fun blog posts planned…but this story just hurt my heart so much that I had to share ASAP. This sentence from the article I read sums up last week’s tragedy well:

“West Boca Raton High School senior Stephanie Kuleba was the captain of the varsity cheerleading team who was fielding scholarship offers from Tulane University, Florida State University and the University of Florida. But her life was cut short Saturday after she suffered a fatal reaction to anesthesia while undergoing breast augmentation surgery.”

Allegedly, along with implants, Stephanie wanted to correct an inverted nipple, which, as I say in Body Drama, 10% of women have and correction does NOT require surgery (tips for everting an inverted nipple are on page 96). I wish she had just learned to accept her body, flaws and all, before undergoing such dangerous surgery. Cosmetic surgery isn’t a spa treatment - there are serious risks involved. In every 5,224 liposuction surgeries, one individual dies. Obviously, fataility rates for procedures like breast augmentation aren’t zero percent, either — Stephanie had a fatal reaction to the anesthesia they gave her during the procedure.

Scarily, she might not be the only teen fatality this year. The number of women getting implants is increasing while the age of the patient is decreasing. As I say in pages 236-239 of Body Drama, more than 300,000 cosmetic procedures are performed on people ages eighteen or younger each year!

Stephanie, you were beautiful just as you were. Hopefully your experience will help other young women appreciate their bodies as-is. RIP, Stephanie, and my prayers to family and friends during this hard time.

Ok, Mariah Rice, a fellow former Miss Virginia, sent this forward over to me and I just COULD NOT RESIST POSTING IT! It is so funny, and an awesome precurser to the “How to Properly Wax Yourself” book extra that I’m posting next month! Here’s the funny forward…enjoy!

PS - don’t forget to enter the reusable menstrual product giveaway by leaving a comment on that post - contest closes April 15th!

———- Forwarded message ———-

> >This is funny. (I don’t have a clue as to who wrote this, but….WHAT A
> >HOOT!)

> >All hair removal methods have tricked women with their promises of easy,
> >painless removal -

> >The Epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and now…the wax.

> >Read on……

> >My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix dinner, play
> >with the kids.

> >I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next
> >few hours:

> >’Maybe should pull the waxing kit out of the medicine cabinet.’

> >So I headed to the site of my demise: the bathroom. It was one of those
> >’cold wax’ kits.

> >No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your
> >hand, they get warm and you peel them apart and press them to your leg (or
> >wherever else) and you pull the hair right off.

> >No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be?

> >I mean, I’m not a genius, but I am mechanically inclined enough to figure
> >this out. (YA THINK!?!)

> >So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other
> >stuck together.

> >Instead of rubbing them together, my genius kicks in so I get out the hair
> >dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. (’Cold wax,’ yeah…right!) I lay the
> >strip across my thigh.

> >Hold the skin around it tight and pull. It works!

> >OK, so it wasn’t the best feeling, but it wasn’t too bad. I can do this!

> >Hair removal no longer eludes me!

> >I am She-rah, fighter of all wayward body hair and maker of smooth skin
> >extraordinaire.

> >With my next wax strip I move north.

> >After checking on the kids, I sneak back into the bathroom, for the
> >ultimate hair fighting championship.

> >I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet.

> >Using the same procedure, I apply the wax strip across the right side of my

> >bikini line, covering the right half of my hoo-ha and stretching down to
> >the inside of my butt cheek (it was a long strip)

> >I inhale deeply and brace myself….RRRRRRIIIIPPP!!!!

> >I’m blind!!!

> >Blinded from pain!!!!….

> >OH MY GAUD!!!!!!!!!

> >Vision returning, I notice that I’ve only managed to pull off half the
> >strip. CRAP!

> >Another deep breath and RIPP! Everything is spinning and spotted.

> >I think I may pass out…must stay conscious…must stay conscious.

> >Do I hear crashing drums???

> >Breathe, breathe…………

> >OK, back to normal.

> >I want to see my trophy -

> >a wax-covered strip, the one that has caused me so much pain, with my hairy

> >pelt sticking to it.

> >I want to revel in the glory that is my triumph over body hair.

> >I hold up the strip!

> > There’s NO hair on it.

> > Where is the hair???

> > WHERE IS THE WAX???

> > Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet.

> > I see the hair.
> > The hair that should be on the strip…it’s not!

> > I touch.

> > I am touching wax.

> > I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is
> >now covered

> > in cold wax and matted hair.

> > Then I make the next BIG mistake…remember my foot is still propped

> >upon the toilet?

> > I know I need to do something.

> > So I put my foot down.

> > Sealed shut!

> > My butt is sealed shut.

> > Sealed shut!

> > I penguin walk around the bathroom trying to figure out what to do
> >and think to myself

> > ‘Please don’t let me get the urge to poop. My head may pop off!’

> > What can I do to melt the wax?

> > Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!!

> > I’ll run the hottest water I can stand into the bathtub, get in,
> >immerse the wax-covered bits and the wax should

> > melt and I can gently wipe it off, right???

> > *WRONG!!!!!!!*

> > I get in the tub -

> > The water is slightly hotter than that used to torture prisoners of
> >war or sterilize surgical equipment - I sit.

> > Now, the only thing worse than having your nether regions glued
> >together,

> > is having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the
> >tub…in scalding hot water.

> > Which, by the way, doesn’t melt cold wax.

> > So, now I’m stuck to the bottom of the tub as though I had cemented
> >myself to the porcelain!!
> > God bless the man who had convinced me a few months ago to have a
> >phone put in the bathroom!!!!!
> >
> > I call my friend, thinking surely she has waxed before and has some
> >secret of how to get me undone.

> > It’s a very good conversation starter ‘So, my butt and hoo-ha are
> >glued together to the bottom of the tub!’

> > There is a slight pause. She doesn’t know any secret tricks for
> >removal but she does try to hide her laughter from me.

> > She wants to know exactly where the wax is located, ‘Are we talking
> >cheeks or hole or hoo-ha?’

> > She’s laughing out loud by now…I can hear her.

> > I give her the rundown and she suggests I call the number on the
> >side of the box.

> > YEAH!!!!! Right!!

> > I should be the joke of someone else’s night.

> > While we go through various solutions. I resort to trying to scrape
> >the wax off with a razor .

> > Nothing feels better than to have your girlie goodies covered in hot

> >wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and then dry-shaving
> >the sticky wax off!!

> > By now the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and

> >I’m pretty sure I’m going to need Post-Traumatic Stress counseling for this

> >event.

> > My friend is still talking with me when I finally see my saving
> >grace….the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax.

> > What do I really have to lose at this point?

> > I rub some on and OH MY STARS!!!!!!!

> > The scream probably woke the kids and scared the dickens out of my
> >friend.

> > It’s sooo painful, but I really don’t care.

> > ‘IT WORKS!!

> > It works !!’ I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she
> >hangs up.

> > I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice to my

> >grief and despair….

> > THE HAIR IS STILL THERE……..ALL OF IT!

> > So I recklessly shave it off. Heck, I’m numb by now. Nothing hurts.

> > I could have amputated my own leg at this point.

> > Next week I’m going to try hair color……